So, one of the reasons that I hate all domestic chores is that I am a horrible cook.
And the funny thing is that as time goes on, I actually get worse instead of better.
When Ever Patient Spouse and I were first married 15 years ago, I went through a phase of ambitious home cookery. I would plan elaborate dinners that involved translating recipes from other languages, dishes with a minimum of 40 ingredients, and shopping lists that required separate trips to at least three different ethnic grocers.
To be fair, some of the meals turned out well.
To be honest, most did not.
The most notorious incident occurred when we invited Spouse’s aunt and uncle over for a dinner featuring salmon as the entree. I purchased a huge piece of salmon from the Pre-Whole Foods Gourmet Store in the town we were living in at the time and got down to the preparation.
Step one said to clean the fish. As a dutiful medical student who was well aware of water-borne illnesses (Cholera, anyone? Yeah, I thought not), I did what anyone would do. I washed the fish. With antibacterial soap.
They’re still talking about the bubbling salmon to this day. Not a dinner winner.
So, tomorrow we’re set to cook a turkey, and a quick Google on the topic told me that once again, the first step is to clean the turkey.